Dialogue Without Damage ? Part 1

August 28th, 2012?????? Comments Off???

David Hall is an entrepreneur and innovator. His latest project is in the field of robotics and human sensory technologies. David has built a small team of experts around him and the company has just acquired a $2 million dollar venture capital financing boost from a private investor.

Things are looking good. A medical consortium in India is hinting at an order of 125 units if their prototypes are approved.

There is just one problem though. And it?s not technology, or a patent or a financing problem.

The real challenge

Two years back, David invited two university friends, Andy and Lisa, innovators and entrepreneurs themselves, to be co-owners of Retina Technologies. In the beginning things went well as they each found a way to bring their expertise forward to build the business. As the company became more stable, relationships between David and his two colleagues have become tense, with infighting about roles and responsibilities and future direction. David is accusing Andy and Lisa of not delivering their share of the workload. Andy and Lisa in turn say that they are delivering way beyond what is expected and that David is a control freak who swings from being prince charming to having temper outbursts in front of the 10 staff. It?s got to the point where the relationship between them is affecting the morale of the staff and the future of the company.

This type of scenario plays out at all levels in many organizations, with high costs to the business and human relationships.

So, what should they do?

Three key actions

There are three actions that David, Andy and Lisa need to do as soon as possible:

1. Decide to work it out

Rather than avoiding talking this out, David, Andy and Lisa need to make a decision to work this out. It?s always easier to take the lower road and to not deal with interpersonal issues because of the anxiety that sets in. But once they make the commitment, they should meet within a few days, preferably in the morning and off-site.

If emotions are extremely high, it is wise to invite a facilitator to help reframe issues, keep the focus and direct the session towards a satisfactory and collaborative outcome.

2. Dive within and deal with personal issues first

This action is probably the most challenging and is the area most people avoid. Because David, Andy and Lisa will feel that the contract between them has been betrayed, and the fantasy of their relationship has faded, it is extremely important that each do a deep dive within to examine the real reasons their own disappointment and their roles in the drama. Each person needs to examine their own projections and take responsibility for their stuff without blame. This might be hard to do in a vacuum without feedback and especially hard if the three leaders have not encouraged? real feedback from colleagues up till now. If the three leaders get in the room without doing this pre-work, the chances are not good for a successful outcome. [More details will follow on this step in the next article].

3. Dialogue without damage

In order to have dialogue without damage, rules of engagement need to be in place so that each participant can speak their mind in a constructive way without playing games, using passive aggression or having hidden agendas. Dialogue without damage means that the real truth of what drives David, Andy and Lisa ? their interests, concerns, disappointments and personal accountabilities are communicated in a transparent way. This is tough because David, Andy and Lisa will want to defend themselves, yet with committed listening to what?s really being said, can be a healing balm. This type of authentic engagement can set the company on a new track. [More details will follow on this step in the next article].

Critical success factor
A critical success factor for any organization, and especially a company that prides itself on innovation and entrepreneurship, is the willingness to engage in clear, authentic dialogue.

A workplace where productivity and morale is low can be traced back to poor and ambiguous communication. This approach gives permission for a non-professional business etiquette to become the norm in the workplace, creating a ripple effect on the culture of the organization. Communication becomes muddy and meetings are mismanaged to the extent that meetings become the major energy-stealers and time-wasters in the organization.

Dialogue without damage is generative in that it calls forth a new future through the flow of meaning in relationship. When we engage in generative dialogue without damage, we interrupt the destructive cycle and create a compelling future.

This article was also published on TheIdeasEngine.com, a division of AuthenticDialogue.com

Dene Rossouw is co-founder of AuthenticDialogue.com and TheIdeasEngine.com in Vancouver, specializing in influencing and innovative solutions. He helps his clients have the necessary conversations of leadership and helps organizations innovate by leveraging the power of employee ideas. He can be reached at 1.778.386.5167.

Source: http://www.authenticdialogue.com/?p=5335&utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=dialogue-without-damage-part-1

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